So like that, it was ... it was true, I was expecting a baby ... much better, I knew when it would happen: October 7, 1991!
I announced the news to Frank. It was like a madman!
I was a little afraid to say it around me. And if this pregnancy was not going to completion?
After all, it is often in the first month we make a miscarriage.
And if this happened?
Yet he had to announce to my mother, I could not keep it to myself.
At that time, I had just renewed dialogue with it, but it was not great.
However, since my childhood, I always spoke with my aunt (the twin sister of my mother). We phoned very often, and we talked during a crazy time!
I thought was a sort of second mother. For his part, she had no daughter, and I think she considered me more than his niece.
We had a great complicity.
So naturally, I called my aunt to tell her the news.
I dared not call my mother. It's like if I had the feeling of being obligated to admit a big mistake. Perhaps the fear that she loves me more then I do not know. But I was afraid to tell him.
So I used my aunt as an intermediary.
She phoned my mother to tell her!
Today it seems like just totally crazy situation.
What had I done wrong?
Is it just because to have this child, I had to sleep with a boy and does not assume that I have to "prove" this to my mother?
If I loved him so much, this mom, why look elsewhere? Why go with a boy, live together, sleep with?
Was not this a clear signal that I sent him: I became great.
But I did not want to become big vis-à-vis her.
me, what I wanted was his little girl again, and we catch up for lost time, she might yet take me in her arms, she loves me!
expecting him to announce that a baby was it not give up being his own, baby. Was I ready for this?!
Still, that's my aunt to announce my mother was pregnant.
My mother called me a few moments later to congratulate me.
The nine months that followed were like a long, gentle anesthesia.
Working, to concentrate on the job: impossible!
I had other priorities!
When I told my partners that I was pregnant, so I had to take 5 or 6 days off without advance notice, I felt a gap between them and me? They
hallucinating, whereas for me, everything they told me I seemed so frivolous!
The same things that I would have beaten me earlier today seemed so insignificant: a contract negotiated ... pftttt y'en will be others!
Fairly quickly I realized that hosting this baby was the only thing that mattered to me now, so we made a deal, and I found myself unemployed! I was 3 months pregnant, and it was great!
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